Secession? Maybe it’s not such a bad idea after all

Unfurl the banners. Sound the trumpets. Welcome to the Republic of Reagan, the world’s newest country. Comprising the former states of South Carolina, Georgia and Florida, Reagan is dedicated to all that used to be good and beautiful about America — God, guns and guts. All white Christians are welcome. You others, there’s a line for you over there. Gays? Don’t bother. Here we wear our religion on our sleeves and our guns on our hips. All hail the Republic of Reagan.

This is the grandiose dream (nightmare?) of former Reagan aide Douglas MacKinnon who is promoting his new book, “The Secessionist States of America…the Blueprint for Creating a Traditionalist Country…Now.” Although MacKinnon insists the book is only an academic exercise, the dramatic and lengthy title alone leaves little doubt there is a lot of wishful thinking here. How hardcore traditionalist Christian would the new nation be? MacKinnon won’t allow Texas in because…immigrants. Perry and his minions will have to form their own country.

My response? I’m all for it. In fact, I wish it would happen. Despite the failures of boneheaded conservative economic and social policies instituted by the governors of Kansas and Wisconsin, voters in Red States still seem eager to hand Republicans the reins of government. Perhaps, just perhaps, if they witnessed the collapse of an entire country run by Republicans, it might start ringing some bells.

This is MacKinnon’s dream: In Reagan, everyone gets to carry a weapon anywhere. Christianity is the official religion. There’s no government welfare or safety net or social security and virtually all institutions and utilities are privately owned. Racism is condoned, being gay is illegal and women are second-class citizens. Only white males can vote or hold office. All media, from TV to movies to theatre, is strictly monitored and controlled by the central government. There are no unions, no minimum wage, no workplace safety rules, no food inspectors and no environmental protections. The government’s sole responsibility is the military, which is enormous.

Yes, it sounds like hell on earth, but this is what conservatives believe in. Let them have it. Give them the rope. Let them put their policies into action on a large scale so that the eventual crash is big enough, loud enough to wake up the slumbering masses. Some of you will claim that the above paragraph describes America today, but we’re not there, not yet at least, and perhaps the only way we won’t end up there is to allow conservatives to run their experiment somewhere else. Like the Republic of Reagan.